It’s funny what you remember the most about some of the best times you’ve had. Oftentimes it has little to nothing to do with what actually transpired. In the case of this weekend spent in Raliegh/Durham/Chapel Hill/RTP/Cary/Everyothercity, North Carolina (it seems), the thing I’ll remember the most is the Kevin Garnett commercial we saw umpteen times where he says the line in the title. I think everyone wants to know what the set up for that line was, it had to be funny!

I arrived at the airport enjoying probably the best feature of an iPod, botherless travel. No mundane conversation from “single serving friends” (Fight Club reference), a seemingly endless supply of great songs, and a battery that actually lasts the entire trip! You can’t beat it with a bat!

We went to Uno’s for lunch. It was pretty good, although the suckas dropped my pizza and had to make me a new one (thus delaying things a bit). They tried to push a dessert on us before eventually giving us each free pizza coupons for our next visit, whenever that may be. Then I got a tour of Duke and NC Central (where Nina is enrolled). Later that night we ate at the Carolina Ale House which was great. Turns out Nina knew the Executive Chef there, through one of her old co-workers. We tried to catch a movie, but just missed the last showing so we called it a night.

The next day we watched part of the In Living Color marathon on BET and then we hooked up with the young homie Adrienne over by NC State. That was fun (although she DID try to get me to see Brokeback Mountain….no way jose!). Adrienne is pretty great!

After that we went to visit UNC’s campus and saw where Che spends most of her days. I fell asleep shortly thereafter as I was tired. While I was sleeping Nina and Che watched School Daze and then we went to this spot called George’s Garage over by Duke for dinner. I had the shrimp scampi. It was pretty good.

After that I tried to meet up with my boy Cade who lives up there, but I couldn’t catch up with him so we went back home and played a game of Monopoly. I pwnt them…..literally! The Magenta properties (St. Charles, States, and Virginia) PLUS Boardwalk and Park Place EQUALS success!

Which leads us to today/yesterday. I hated to leave, but I got on my 12:55 flight back to Nashville. My flight was full which sucked, I was stuck next to an obese white lady and her husband. Luckily I had my iPod and sudoku to keep me occupied.

I got back and ate at Carrabba’s with the homies Julian and PJ and then got home and took a nap. Now it’s back to the regular old Nashville crap.

*sigh*

Oh by the way, please keep my family in your thoughts/prayers….I’ll tell you why if/when I need to (respect my discretion here and don’t ask right now….if I want to talk to you about it, I probably already have…no offense).

Things are changing so rapidly around her….H is gone….everyone else is about to be (well almost)….sometimes it feels like everyone is already gone honestly….

Thinking about it sucks….

I’m going to North Carolina on Friday to see my sisters….that is always good for my soul….

I spend alot of time lately doing searches on Youtube. That site is great! I came up on all sorts of TV Intros and what not as well as funny clips from ALL over the place. The internet is the greatest.

Oh I’ve also been watching Kevin Smith movies again lately (Jay and Silent Bob Strikes Back, Dogma, Chasing Amy, etc.) That’s always fun.

Well I guess I should get ready to roll out….*sigh*….

I think it was PJ. I hate to blame the little guy, but honestly I haven’t been around too many other people who were sick and he was sneezing. I went to great lengths to avoid Geoff because he sounded like death. But here I am, wishing that the hour would pass so I can have my next dose of Dayquil. This damned Birdflu is a monster y’all!! I had so planned to kick it this weekend too!

So let me tell you the latest foolish action of the Killa. Actually a scene in Anchorman sums it up best. Peep game, as it went down….kinda like this….she knows who she is!

Ron Burgandy: Hello.
Veronica Corningstone: Hello.
Ron Burgandy: Hope I’m not disturbing you, but, uh, I saw you from across the party, and, uh, I don’t usually do this, but I felt compelled to tell you something. You have…an absolutely breathtaking…heinie. I mean, that thing is good. I want to be friends with it.
Veronica Corningstone: Well, you certainly know how to compliment a woman. Now, if you’ll excuse me.
Ron Burgandy: Do you know who I am?
Veronica Corningstone: No, I can’t say that I do.
Ron Burgandy: I don’t know how to put this, but I’m kind of a big deal.
Veronica Corningstone: Really?
Ron Burgandy: People know me.
Veronica Corningstone: I’m very happy for you.
Ron Burgandy: I’m very important. I have…many leather-bound books, and my apartment smells of rich mahogany. I… I’m friends with Merlin Olsen, too. He comes over on occasion. That’s stupid.
Veronica Corningstone: No, no, that’s…very exciting.
Ron Burgandy: Listen, can I…can I start over again?
Veronica Corningstone: Sure.
Ron Burgandy: I wanna say something. I’m gonna put it out there. If you like it, you can take it. If you don’t, send it right back.
Veronica Corningstone: Mm-hmm.
Ron Burgandy: I wanna be on you.
[Veronica walks away]
Ron Burgandy: Wait. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. I…I wanna be on you.

Yep, it went down almost exactly like that…in a series of internet exchanges….

I hope you (whoever you are) enjoy your weekend!

Your boy tried to make an entry Sunday morning about the events of Saturday night….but for whatever reason, MovableType doesn’t like me, so it didn’t post….this is my second (and final) attempt!

Names have been changed to protect the innocentmembers of the bar association!

So the night started with the Killa dressing up to go to the Blackout. All of you myspace members can see me in my full glory on my myspace profile under “view pics”! Yeah I gotta admit I was looking nice.

Anyway, so the homie JPB picked me up and we rolled out toward Murfreesboro Road (after I picked up a can of Red Bull baby….and some cups for the bottles of vodka and cranberry juice he had in the back!). On the way out there we sort of hedged on the spot, once to the area we saw that it wasn’t really “jumping” so we headed to his friend Jess’s house.

After she made us some rum runners, it was decided that the Blackout wasn’t going to be the move afterall, instead the three of us would meet our friend “Tickets” and her girl (who will henceforth be referred to as Golden Delicious….not quite as big as a Red Delicious, but still an apple…LOL….thanks for that one Tickets) at Level 88.

We got to the spot and it appears that Ticket’s and Golden Delicious were on the same agenda as us and had already started their drinking, which was good! They hopped in the car and got some good ole pre-club drinking in!

At this point an earring was broken, and complaints of “light pink drinks” were made! All indicators pointed to a great night!

Eventually we made our way into the club. It was packed with all sorts of people, surprisingly not all of them were over the age of 40! A good number were actually around our collective ages. They didn’t have a band performing (or if they did, we missed them). I immediately headed to the bar (even though I had already gotten nice in the car).

After everyone was in and settled we headed for the dance floor. Now the homie JBP is known to get down as far as dancing goes. Like usually he’s the best dancing male out there and used to being the center of attention. However that night he was UPSTAGED by a dude who was clearly possessed….or on Speed….either way JPB wasn’t getting the spotlight tonight. Buddy was resplendent in his red velvet shirt, JC Penney’s suit vest (from a three piece suit), and Fedora with red feather! Oh and in case you were wondering or had any doubt OF COURSE he had a jheri curl. And he was doing all manner of splits and spins. At one point he brought his antics to the stage! Buddy was doing it man! JPB still did his thing though, impressing the tables who weren’t under the spell of Fedora buddy.

At one point I looked up and I saw frequent reader Mr. Cohiba. I hadn’t seen him in awhile. I also saw a guy who is as M.I.A. from Meharry circles as I am. At those points I knew the nights events were blog worthy.

Anyway the D.J. was playing the right music, the women we came with were looking nice, and I had a ton of drinks, so OF COURSE the Killa actually did some SUPER RARE Killastyle offbeat dancing!

So we danced, drank, danced, laughed, and danced until they turned the lights on at the spot. Shortly before closing I had one last drink from my favorite bartender in all of Nashville, Stephanie (yeah even better than the previous night’s girl Ty), despite already being frunk as duck (c in a circle).

It was decided after we left that we were hungry, well most of us were anyway. Golden Delicious apparently had surpassed her drinking threshold, and fell asleep almost as soon as we entered the car.

We ended up going to the OLD Killa spot (introduced by Geoff), Cafe Coco (well, Golden Delicious stayed in the car). They’ve changed the late night menu a bit, but the food was still good. However, I wasn’t really focused so much on the food as trying to get Tickets to well….show her tickets…(yes, yes, the Killa is one of those kind of drunks…though I’m sure it’d be a better/more memorable experience sober!!!). Yes, sexual harrassment makes every event better!

Anyway, after much unsuccessful lobbying we decided to call it a night. All in all I had a good ole hedonistic time as I’m sure everyone else did. The ladies are all still talking to me, so apparently alls well that ends well!

And that’s the much ballyhooed and oft-delayed story!

Me and the homie Nile each got messages on myspace from folks we went to middle school with, which was weird.

Of course that started a chain of events which led to me making a statement about feeling like Napoleon Dynamite’s Uncle Kip, and wanting a Time Machine. But if I had said time machine I wouldn’t go back to 1982, I’d probably run from my future self. No, I’d go back to my birthday in 1990, and I’d leave a notebook for myself. Here are some of the points of advice I’d leave for myself:

Don’t go after that kickball! - (note to readers: You may remember the entry I wrote about the summer of 1990.) Yeah this one event set off a chain of events that, just ain’t cool and is 100% preventable. I mean who’s to say I wouldn’t fuck my grill up later on, but probably not! So yeah, Young Killa Cal, leave that groundball alone, as a matter of fact…don’t even play!

Start working out/running now!! - Young Killa Cal doesn’t have to be the best athlete, your coordination will forever prevent that, but GET IN SHAPE! It’s possible, and only takes like 30 minutes to an hour out of the day, but you GOTTA get in the habit….Super Mario will be there later…and it’ll be on a computer so you won’t have to blow on that dusty cartridge!!!

Don’t treat the not so cute girls so meanly…. - Just like you’ll look better when you get older, so will the girls you pick on! Don’t do it just because everyone else is doing it, be nicer, it’ll pay off when they blossom in college, TRUST me….And on the flip side don’t go out of your way to be TOO nice to these pretty girls, EVERYONE is jocking them, and you won’t stand out, and these are their BEST days (with a couple of exceptions). Oh and be nicer to Nina and Che’s friends too….and Radiance….they will all have cute friends when you get older!

When George Bush’s son runs for President in 2000, start a letter writing/voter registration campaign in Florida for Blacks - Just trust me on that one!!! You could save THOUSANDS of lives…(yes I’m trying to alter my future to make me a hero)

Don’t take your ability to learn quickly for granted - Don’t get lazy! Keep reading, keep studying….eventually the world will catch up to you if not! In 7th Grade you’ll do well on the SAT and get in contact with Duke University….MAKE SURE YOU FOLLOW THROUGH!

Stand up to Robert - You don’t know him yet. When you first see him you might even laugh and think he’s not a threat….HE IS….don’t punk out….stand up to that nigga, let him pick on Jamel or someone….even Nile….but NOT YOU!

Forget about KS or any other girl you USED to like - Too many girls in the sea, and it starts an unhealthy trend of selling yourself short and putting too much focus on unworthy targets….learn to move on! Every dude gets dissed/moves away/has to deal with not getting the girl he wants…..you aren’t an exception!

Be nicer to your mom and dad - They really are doing a good job….trust me….and when you go to the radio station with Dad VALUE that time….it won’t last forever….he’s going to tell you that shortly and he’s right!

I wonder if Young Killa Cal would pay attention to the advice?

Later today I’ll try AGAIN to recount Saturday Nights events….they were very blogworthy, even if Movable Type acted an ass the first time I tried to publish!

…and it wouldn’t post….I’m bummed out!

Actually, eff that, I shouldn’t be allowed to use a COMPUTER while drunk. And last night folks, I was most DEFINIETLY frunk as duck (c in a circle)!

I hope I didn’t make too much of an ass of myself…..but if I did, oh well! It’s like that folks!

The bartender last night (Tai, Ty, Tye…whatever the spelling), was off the hook. She laced me with two shots of some concoction she put together and she was nice enough to give me the recipe. I’m going to get someone’s unsuspecting daughter as drunk as I was last night with one of those. It helped that I also had about 8 or 9 Red Bull and Vodkas.

One of the things about me getting drunk is, I’m about 80% likely to have a wild ass dream and last night was no exception. There is no way I would post the contents of said dream as I may lose a few friends over it, but let’s say that the Killa was very Leon “the Ladies Man” Phelps-ish in his behavior….and the ladies were with it!

So now I have to deal with the hangover from hell, luckily I have some Sprite, and some time! Now if only I could find my phone!

I don’t believe Jackie is gonna read this….as a matter of fact…..I dare Jackie, the next time she sees me to ask me for $20 bucks….if she does this then I’ll believe her…..although I may ask her to buy me drinks using said $20….

Anyway I had fun rollin out tonight with the fellas…MLK weekend is already off the hook…

Holla!

30 BG, 7500 Songs PC + Mac!!

HOLLA!!!

It’s the greatest man…even though I haven’t used it yet officially, it’s just charging….

But as I told the homie Julian, no more packing a bunch of CD’s and having to change CD’s on the bus with the lights off!

Now I can listen to Raekwon, Ghostface, ODB, Gza, and the original Wu CD at the click of a button or two!

I’m the man!!!!

So the homie Geoff got an iPod Nano for Christmas, so I’ve had a chance to play around with it and I realize that this is one of those devices that the Killa needs in his never ending quest for happiness.

Well, in that vein I went to the Apple Store with the homie Julian and the youngest homie of them all, Pizzle Jizzle fa shizzle! The Apple store at Green Hills Mall is interesting. They have it set up so that there are a bunch of computers, each attached to whatever model of iPod that section of the store is pushing. Unfortunately for the Killa none of these is what he wants.

See alls I really need is the one that came out awhile back with 20 or 40 gigs of space. I don’t need the video or photo capability, really I don’t! All I want to do is listen to music. The Nano’s are the perfect size, but that’s not enough space, I need at least 20 gigs! I mean my 5-star list is over 8 gigs itself!

I’m also cheap/thrifty. I’m not trying to spend over $200, especially since I have to replace this camera and visit my sisters in North Carolina!

I don’t want a knock off either….I have Apple playlists, and I use iTunes, so using some other product is too much for my lazyness quotient….I guess I’ll just have to wait until that mythical day when I have disposable income!

Anyways, today is “babysit PJ day” which is also “wash clothes day”. How mundane is my life? Oh it’s time to sign up for poker!